More than fandom

Been a fan of BoA since I was in Primary 5, which is a total of 10 years and counting. I might come off as obsessive or crazy, I'm aware, but I regard her more than just an idol. She's a role model to me. So when she had her Korean comeback, I was beyond thrilled and happy. It's rather disappointing as she didn't get as many wins as before, but I do appreciate the fact that most of the songs in the album are her very own production. I've seen her mature in her music (rather Japanese and Western influenced now which is not surprising considering her involvement in both Japan and the States, which isn't a bad thing! It's different from the rest) and I feel really proud of her. Some of my favourite tracks are 

1. Only One

Melodious and soothing, very different from her previous title tracks, which are usually the heavy-bass, blood pumping sort of dance tracks. It's very easy fall in love with this track because it's a song everyone can easily relate to, I believe. Absolutely LOVE the choreography for this track too. Lyrical Hiphop is something that I appreciate, just because it's expressive, strong and yet flowy at the same time. The choreography is a visual representation of the song, and I think the whole arrangement makes the song complete. Just awesome!

2. The Shadow

Super edgy, super cool. Not your typical dance track. Doesn't sound like much on the first listen, but grows on you after the second. Besides, she looks mighty fine in the music video.

3. Not Over You

Actually I like all the songs in the album. Most of the songs aren't the sort that you'd think "omg so catchy" at the first listen. They are the sort that requires a couple of listens to fully appreciate the uniqueness (which I actually like!). The lyrics are all pretty meaningful too.

Alright, enough fangirling.

I've realised I haven't been updating much. So much to backtrack. Just so caught up with my responsibilities now. Can't wait for it to be all over. But when will it ever?

Losing it

About to lose it anytime. Handling things alone? Not easy at all. Especially if you don't have the necessary materials. I've been whining for the past month but there's honestly nothing I can do to improve the situation. Really hate everything now. & isn't it basic courtesy to at least be polite to people you wanna seek help from? Just wanna set fire to every single fucking thing. BURN. BURNNNNN!

I really have NO IDEA what I'm doing.

Certainty

& I realised how nothing can be certain, and how everything is intricately related to everything else. One thing connects to another: results are started by causations. One wrong move can kill. & I realise how I keep talking about the same thing over and over again because that's just how insecure, how skeptical I am. It's ridiculous how the whole world can crumble down because of ONE single decision that ONE person made. It's ridiculous how some things you thought may never occur, occurs. It's ridiculous how I don't understand how so many things work. It's ridiculous how so many things are ridiculous in this world.

I can't handle stress, I'll admit that. I respect people who can.

Just so many things going through my head right now. & I suddenly thought to myself that things are never just black and white. They can't be that simple. The world is just made up with different shades of grey.

Second week of the new semester and I'm already feeling lethargic. Need strength to carry on.

No, don't. That crazy sensation rushes right into your skull and you can't rid it. But no. Defy it. Hold on to yourself because it's what you told yourself to do, right from the start. Guard, with all your might. Once you lose it, you'll spin out of control. Nobody wants that.

Received a text from someone whom I thought have exited my life for good. Really glad to know you're doing fine. If we ever meet again.

Dead hearts are everywhere, everywhere.
x

This is it boys, this is war

Tick tick, time's up. As much as I've been putting away this thought, it's time to wake up my idea, 'cos term starts tomorrow. In actual fact, just 13hours to my first lesson. Never thought 3 months of Summer break could fly pass this quickly. I could never be more wrong. Facing my nightmare. PUT YOUR HORSE COME HERE, BITCH. *swagger* *head shake* *bitch please face* *finger snapping*

Haven't been updating much. Been too busy enjoying my last few weeks of freedom (I make it sound like a fucking death sentence) to remember to blog. I always open the blogger page, attempt to type something, but drift off somewhere else. Gotta start packing for hall life (yay???). Till next time!

Signing off, Gangnam style.

x

For moment I believed it wouldnt be you. I guess i was right not to put my heart into it. Isn't this just what happens? Nothing can be certain. NOTHING. Just really irked by the disparity between what has been said and what has been done. You can never put complete faith in anyone, or humanity. Then again the lines are blur. There isn't a boundary to begin with. It isn't wrong. I'm not angry. Find no reason to feel that way. It'll be dumb of me if i felt that way. Just disgusted (and perhaps a tint of disappointment). These sort of people seem to be everywhere. I give up.

Also, drinking session with the Aztec/Axis people was beyond awesome. 2 bottles, 5 people. My liver has probably shrunken into a prune, all wrinkled and unable to function. If my liver had a mouth it would probably be screaming. Never ever felt like puking cos of alcohol but found myself rushing to the toilet when I woke up this morning. Not sure if it's the alcohol or because of the text I received.