Affairs of the heart

The boy and I had a huge thrash-out session yesterday night. All the small things added up to big problems in the past 2 years. I always thought our relationship was going fine and stable. But I realised there was many things bottled up on my part. I believe that communication is extremely vital in a relationship. But when I realised that my expectations and thinking is different from his, I gave up talking. When he doesn't understand my POV, I feel upset, but I tell myself "wake up tmrw and it'll be fine". Saying "it's okay" when it really isn't the case. I tell myself to accept it and try to adapt to the way he thinks and the way he does things. I always thought I was doing fine. Until yesterday, I realised that something was so wrong. I was unhappy with a lot of things and yet I didn't voice it out simply because I gave up trying. I shocked myself while talking to him. It was then I realised how unhappy I am. & we realised that we've actually so much difference that it's scary. 2years odd, and it's the first time I saw him cry because of sadness. "I didn't realise I was doing such a bad job as a boyfriend. I always thought I was fine." I felt like such a horrible horrible person for saying all the harsh things and hurting the person I love the most. It's the worse we've been through just yet. We were so close to giving up and, whenever he mentioned giving up my heart tore a little. We were hanging on such a thin thread. But we sat down, talked through it. We shouted at each other, cried, wiped our tears, cried again and finally settled everything that has been clogging up our hearts. Our relationship is too dear to be given up. Now that we've talked it out, we'll both work harder to be better individuals and lovers. We may look at certain issues differently, but as long as we have the commitment we'd be able to tide through any storm. Love conquers all. I'm gonna hang on to you whether you like it or not bby! :p

love you ♥
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