Got me dumbfounded and frozen for that few seconds. Didn't think you'd have the ability to, considering how long it has been, and how numb I've been feeling these days. I left for a reason, for a change. Things are different, I am different. But you won't know what else remains unchanged, if you don't bother to really find out.  I'm not placing a judgement on you. I could. So why would you? Actually no, I know. Futile attempt to justify the causation. Just say what you want to, do what you want to. & that just reminds me of why I gave it up in the first place. It was nothing that I was holding on to.